Solitude is a creative space. I am not talking about loneliness, I am not talking about the feeling of just being pushed away. I am talking about this space of being with oneself, this spiritual space that makes us remain in contact with ourselves. But being alone with ourselves isn't always an easy thing. That choice is difficult because solitude is like a light that makes us see terrible things about who we really are, if only we dare to look.
We are used to hiding behind the huge mask of the crowd, letting our voice drop in the maddening hum of the multitude. Sometimes we may be afraid to stand alone, yes... because we might not even stand alone. We want to learn on someone, we know we are so broken, if we stand alone, we crumble down into a rubble heap. And when we are left alone, to walk the wide stretch of the interior open space, to hear nothing but our discordant strain, to see nothing but our belated dreams, to hold nothing but our brokenness. No! That is scary.
But mind you.... relationship doesn't blossom without this choiced solitude which lightens perception. When we choose to enter into this sphere, it isn't always a kind of flight, it is a journey where we meet faces we love... where we repose in our wounds, where we become patient with ourselves, learning to love and accept who we are without carrying any "grudges", regrets, or negative sentiments. In this way, solitude doesn't only become creative but healing. Solitude places us before our choices, before our dreams, before our hurts and most importantly, before our gifts, our strengths and our talents. We rediscover them always with gratitude. We also get hints about new prospects of growth, about a beauty we might be ignoring.
It is not healthy to always be in the crowd. Standing out is triumph. Most often it is. And it always leads us somewhere.