facing bitterness

I am writing this in view of the reactions I got from the post on bitterness. Identifying its causes could be on of the great paths towards healing. Before I say whatever I would say, I deem it worthwhile pointing out a common characteristic which hinders healing in depressed and bitter persons. It is this tendency to point a finger at others, to feel that others make me feel the way I do, to shift the blame...

I have never thought of myself as being a scapegoat to any form of injustices. We all will suffer injustice as a matter-of-course. But the way we allow it to affect us is another story. I equally believe that we would hardly find a common antidote for a particular emotional ill... because we are all unique in the way we suffer.

Self-awareness is the process of consciousness, of knowing who we are, of being able to identify our hurts. But identifying them is always a starting point and not the end of the process. Awareness disposes us to measure our emotional strengths, to identify our frustrated dreams, our broken hopes, our strengths and weakness, the hurts, both ours and those of others.

Awareness prepares us for acceptance... Very often our initial reaction to hurts is that of denial. We get into that pattern of thought we we stress the "this isn't just possible" or "it can't be happening to me" or "I don't believe this". We want to push the reality to a sphere of forgetfulness... we want to estrange ourself from it because it hurts. We may refuse to look into the pain in us, but the truth is that pain remains and nags at us and follows us everywhere we go.

Once we face any kind of pain, the moment we admit the hurt, we rob it of its sting. Acceptance means we are ready to put the hurt where it can heal. It means we are ready to move over it. It means we know it. Once we know it, we can figure out how to handle it. This is just an approach that I propose in facing bitterness.